DAY 24
LOCATION: Phu Quoc

If the evenings are quiet on Phu Quoc, the early mornings are silent. I arrived at the beach for a sunrise run as the first rays of light kissed the palm trees behind me. No people, no rumbling junk motors, just the sand, the ocean, and my breath. What a feeling!

I headed south again, out to the place I had the massage. The evolving pastels caused me to stop more than once, a favorite Dar Williams’ lyric repeating in my head: “Well the sun rose, with so many colors it nearly broke my heart, it worked me over like a work of art, and I was a part of all that.”

As I got closer to the fisherman’s village, signs of life emerged amongst the locals. Boys prepping their boats, women observing the planet’s morning ritual, a couple of men swimming in the gentle waters. While I had no knowledge of their state of mind or the hardships they might be facing, I couldn’t...

DAY: 23
LOCATION: Phu Quoc

It didn’t take me long to adjust to island time. I spent an impressive three hours at breakfast, the first to arrive and last to leave. Most of that was catching up with with Monika, some of it was researching Berlinale, and all of it fueled by coffee and tropical fruit.

“Amy, this is so good for you. You really haven’t been alone in ages, there’s always some boy around. Just forget about Levi for a minute, I mean, let’s be real - he lives in Switzerland and isn’t really in line with you. Just do you.”

“I know, but I can’t help it, I like him,” I whined. “I’m really gonna try to stay in my own experience today though and relax.”

“Good,” she replied. “And no more texting James either. That needs to stop, for both of you.”

Of all my addictions, love was the hardest to break. Being alone on Phu Quoc made this painfully obvious. I wasn’t obsessing about...

DAY: 22
LOCATION: Ho Chi Minh City, Phu Quoc

When deciding where to go in Southeast Asia, I naturally asked Tim for recommendations. He’d been a few years back, and gave me a rundown of his faves:

Tim: Laos is dreamy by all accounts
Tim: Avoid da nang
Tim: Hoi an is Disney but fxcking cute af, SUPER TOURISTY
Tim: I didn’t love HCMC
Tim: Google phu quoc – that was my fave

Well, I Googled, and it looked picturesque, but even if I hadn’t I would’ve booked it on Tim’s word alone. Warm aquamarine waters, fresh coconuts, and massages on the beach awaited.

Word of advice: when flying out of HCMC, leave for the airport early. I got an Uber at 7am, allowing two and a half hours before my flight, but even that caused me stress. The driver didn’t know what he was doing, the check-in line was interminable, and security took ages. Gahhhhh. I tried to maintain perspective - the worst thing that...

DAY: 21
LOCATION: Ho Chi Minh City

Several friends had told me I didn’t need to spend much time in HCMC, so I had only one full day to sightsee before heading to an island. I started the morning off with a salute to the city’s name sake, the Communist revolutionary leader Chu Tich Ho Chi Minh. His friendly statue greeted me on my walk to a hipster café.

A hipster café? You say. Yup. They’re littered all over the city. It’s one of the biggest social things to do, especially at night. And while it’s clearly the influence of European culture (the French introduced coffee production to the country during their occupation), the Vietnamese have most certainly made it their own.

Well, except for maybe the place I’d chosen due to it’s early opening time – L’Usine. I might as well have been in Silverlake, with posters of the Great Smoky Mountains and Joshua Tree, fixie bicycles, and...

DAY: 20
LOCATION: Singapore, Ho Chi Minh City

I really didn’t want to leave Levi. Watching him get out of bed that morning, his naked silhouette crossing the room, I wished we could stay in this Hyatt cocoon indefinitely. Partly it was the sex, partly the fact Jay had cancelled on me last minute for a business trip and I was scared to be alone in Vietnam, but mostly it was because I just liked him.

I stayed in bed, hoping he would come back. I wasn’t ready to get up, to pack, to put on makeup. I wanted to feel his warmth a little longer, to feel that connection to the masculine. He returned.

We had breakfast in the hotel, a grand buffet with plenty of vegan options. We chatted about food and health (subjects I never seem to tire of), and then we were back in the room, my bags ready to go.

“Why don’t they have news stations like this in America?” Levi asked, the TV streaming BBC...

DAY: 19
LOCATION: Singapore

We didn’t get out of bed until 2pm. A combination of amazing pillows, sleep, and really good sex. If it hadn’t been for that other main biological driver – food – we might not have gotten up at all.

“Pool?” Levi suggested.

“Pool,” I confirmed.

I slipped into my new bikini feeling a thousand times more confident than last night. I look good, I thought, admiring my (very subtle) curves. I’m a woman. Funny how primal acts can remind you of the obvious.

“Coffee?” I offered, tinkering with the Nespresso machine as he got ready.

“Sure,” his accent floated in from the other room. I smiled at the connection between his salt and pepper hair and Clooney’s. Advertising works, friends.

He walked in and I handed him the espresso. It felt far more natural than it should’ve. Like, of course we met two weeks ago in Sydney and just combined our bodies in blissful...

DAY: 18.5
LOCATION: Bali, Singapore

I arrived in Bali to a confirmation email from Levi - he had booked the room for the extra night. What a relief to not be playing hopscotch around the city in the wee hours of the morning! I did feel bad though about canceling on my teacher at the eleventh hour. I sent him an apology from the gate.

Me: Thank you so much for opening your doors (if only through email) if I end up marrying this Levi character, you and Camille are both invited to the wedding!
Teach: well… ok ☺ we should have invited him to stay here with you! ☺

I laughed out loud in the middle of the airport. While it would’ve made for an unbelievable story, the thought of having sex in my high school teacher’s house at 31 years of age with a guy I’d just started seeing was… too ridiculous even for me.

Speaking of sex, I was getting nervous. Not that I didn’t want to – I definitely...

DAY:18
LOCATION: Cairns, Bali

The fatigue hit hard. The craziness of the last few days left me curled in the fetal position, not wanting to get out of bed. Not even the plethora of mosquito bites I’d acquired could get me to move. Maybe I should just lie here all day…

Of course I didn’t. Maybe I should’ve – I was going to need my energy for my weekend with Levi - but I wanted to experience the beauty of Cairns to the last drop. I cannot rest from travel: I will drink life to the lees… Besides, I could sleep on the plane.

I bicycled over to the botanical gardens. There would be no running today, just a slow meander. I couldn’t seem to figure out the lock, and the bike tipped over, scratching my leg.

“Fuck!” My eyes welled with tears, my frustration outsized. “What the fuck?!”

I finally got it secured and sat next to a little creek, breathing hard. The rocks started to move – crabs...

DAY: 17
LOCATION: Cairns, Great Barrier Reef

If you’ve ever been slammed into on the freeway, you know how awful it feels afterwards. Even if you walk away without any major injuries like broken bones or gaping wounds, you still feel like shit for the coming days and weeks. Beyond sore, completely drained of energy, emotionally distraught, depressed – it’s no joke.

Amazingly, I felt none of those things the morning after my Oz accident. My body felt so okay I wondered if I’d actually woken up. Was this a dream? My neck felt fine, my back didn’t hurt, I didn’t even have a headache. A travel miracle. And while I knew I’d suffered some pretty serious trauma, and would likely be experiencing PTSD, right then I felt fairly stable. Definitely stable enough to go to the Great Barrier Reef.

I rode one of Carrie’s beach cruisers to the pier. It was grey and drizzly, definitely not optimal...

DAY: 16
LOCATION: Cairns

Oh what a beautiful morning
Oh what a beautiful day
I’ve got a wonderful feeling,
Everything’s going my way.

I woke up feeling positively jazzed. Today was the first day since Melbourne I felt 100 percent healthy, so I celebrated with a run through the botanical gardens, my first in Oz. Some of my favorite moments in life have been running abroad, so I was seriously happy to be kicking up those endorphins.

While not quite as removed as the Daintree, the rainforest boardwalk provided an excellent landscape for a fully immersed meditative run (and less than a mile from the house!) It had the same “alive” quality, the whole place buzzing with interconnected activity. No need for headphones with this sort of natural symphony.

By the time I got home, I was a blissed out sweaty mess. The clock hadn’t even struck 9, but the sun was already getting intense...