Phangan in the Nude

DAY: 41
LOCATION: Samui, Koh Phangan

My last class and breakfast at Vikasa did not disappoint. Sunrises on infinity pools and scruff on sexy yogis, warm tropical breezes and coconut milk coffees – these were a few of my favorite things. I actually felt sad that I wasn’t staying on Samui the whole time now, but I knew adventures awaited on Koh Phangan.

A shuttle picked me up at 3pm and delivered me to Bo Phut pier. I found a bench to set my bag down on the ferry then draped myself on the railing. It was partly cloudy, which meant cotton candy thunderheads and poetic sun breaks. This is the life I signed up for! I thought as we pulled away from the dock, borrowing my mom’s favorite phrase.

As I fawned over nature’s grandeur the whole trip, nobody else seemed to be paying attention. A group of bros slammed beers, a tatted couple made out, some women gossiped, but not a single other person was floored by the sky and ocean spectacle like I was. I longed for someone to share it with, to affirm my experience… Levi?

Although sometimes having a partner wasn’t always the best thing while traveling, as proven by a couple on the shared tuk tuk heading to Sri Thanu. Before we took off, the driver asked us for the equivalent of $5 a person and the guy tried to haggle him lower. His significant other pleaded with him to just accept the charge (there was no other transport), but nope, he was not going to pay that $5. We left them arguing in the parking lot.

If Chaweng had been taken over by Hard Rock culture, then Sri Thanu was the embodiment of the New Age. At least, from what I could see from the road, which included yoga centers, holistic cafes, and plenty of vegan restaurants. Hello scruffy animal-loving yogis!

While minimalist in it’s design, Benjamin’s Hut offered new, clean rooms steps from the beach. If you can make do with just a ceiling fan, this place hits the spot for around $30 a night. It was much closer to my memories of Samui, even if it lacked the wide white sand beach. Plus, it had perfect viewing for the sunset from a tree swing, which I was just in time to catch.

“Want me to take a pic of you?” A voice called out as I attempted a selfie on my phone. It belonged to a beautiful man, because why wouldn’t it?

“Uh, yeah, sure,” I said, slightly embarrassed. I handed him my phone and he snapped a few photos of me jumping for joy.

“Where are you from?” I asked.

“New York for 15 years, but Israel originally. Hence the accent,” he smiled. Another sexy Israeli, exactly what I needed.

He gave me some advice on the island – he’d been coming here a month at a time the last few years. He told me the best yoga places, his favorite vegan desserts, the secret beach a little further north.

“Wait, but how am I supposed to find it if it’s secret? Can you take me there tomorrow?” I really didn’t mean to sound as flirty as I did.

“Hmm, yeah, I think that could work. I’m staying in Haad Rin, but I could come back over. What’s your number? I’ll text you in the morning.” He was one of those guys who could really pull off the bald look, with gorgeous skin and great bone structure. I inputted my number and we hugged goodbye.

For dinner I walked back along the main road we came in on. It was a perfect evening, the air soft and floral scented, Sweet Water Lake singing with insects. I passed a couple of cute Thai places, like the authentically ramshackle Mama Pooh’s, but tonight I was intent on trying one of the colorful vegan restaurants.

I landed on Karma Kafe. The entry welcomed me with all-natural yoga garb, Zen and Hindu books, dreamcatchers, crystals, sage, and other spiritualist items for purchase. Browsing over the menu, I got a little too excited. Tempeh spirulina wraps, raw veggie sushi, burritos and quesadillas.

“Oh my god, this all looks so good! What’s your fave?” I asked the girl at the counter. She directed me to the beetroot burger, and then we chatted about living on Phangan.

“It’s totally doable. I mean, I don’t make a ton of money or anything, but I live in paradise, and do all of the things I love.”

“Sounds like enough to me!”

I sat cross legged at one of the low tables with cushions and waited for my food. I observed a four top of girls laughing, a hot single guy blessing his food. Wait, what? Who was this man? I watched as he ate slowly and mindfully. Britt was so right about this place.

My “burger” came and I tried not to wolf if down in 3 minutes. Do like the Buddhist masters. I glanced over at Blessing Guy. He was now reading a book on ascension.

“Are you reading a book on ascension?” It popped out of my mouth from nowhere.

“I am, have you read it?” He got up and came and sat right in front of me.

“I, uh, no, but I’m interested in it,” I said, caught off guard by our shared forwardness.

His name was Fritz, and he was from Amsterdam. We quickly dove into a conversation about higher realms of consciousness. Well, really it was me explaining red-faced how new I was to all this, and him listening and nodding intently.

“Can you feel the energy circling between us?” His eyes shimmered as his hands illustrated the movement.

“I, uh, yeah, it’s, uh, intense,” I replied, certainly feeling something.

He started to blow on me. Yup, like with his breath. I really wanted to laugh, but it felt kind of good, and maybe this was part of some deeper connecting ritual? I played it cool.

“Have you tried any tantra practices?” he asked.

“Nope! Don’t think I’m ready for that!!” Now I was laughing. All I knew about tantric sex I learned from Sting, which is to say, very little.

“I think you are. It’s about experiencing every moment fully with your senses. Me blowing on you is a tantric exercise,” he explained.

“Oh, okay.” I felt a little more comfortable, but not much. My phone buzzed. I checked it.

Britt: Welcome to Phangan! You should come to The Dome right now, I think you’d love it!

“Have you heard of this place?” I showed him the message.

“Oh yes, my friends are there, shall we go? We can take my motorbike.”

And so we did. Clutching his waist, the moon reflecting off the lazy tide, I felt like I was in a dream. For a moment, I wondered if this could be my life, like the girl at Karma Kafe…

The Dome was off a secluded dirt road. It featured a bonfire, an unbelievable sound system playing chill electronic music, a little lodge offering snacks, and igloo steam rooms and outdoor showers.

“You each get one of these,” an earth goddess handed us a towel. “Of course clothing is optional. Enjoy!”

Clothing optional? Tantric blowing? What have I gotten myself into? I nervously undressed in the lodge, which had no changing room. Here goes nothing!

We found Britt at the campfire. Fritz knew her, and everyone else - it was a community of tantra practitioners. Everybody seemed very open and relaxed, nothing to be scared of.

After half an hour or so, Fritz and I made our way to the igloo. We stepped in through a small door, the steam chokingly thick. Gaze down, I sat next to Fritz on the top level. He immediately dropped his towel, I clutched mine for dear life. I would never call myself prude, but public nudity was something just not done in the US.

Gradually I allowed myself to glance around – everyone was towel-less. Ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh, I thought as I released mine. Oh my god I’m naked in front of strangers!!!

It actually wasn’t that bad. After the initial shock, it felt quite natural. Like, yeah we all have bodies, so what? Nobody was judging me, nobody cared. It was really pretty freeing.

Back at the bonfire, massages were being given. Three or four people would work on a single body – it looked amazing. I laid my head down in Fritz’s lap and he started rubbing my temples. As I looked up at the stars, I felt a level of oneness and perfection I rarely experienced. How could existence be so magical?

We did one more steam, then left the dwindling flames. The ride back I didn’t want it to end. I felt high on energy and hot humid air. I knew instinctively I’d feel different in the morning, like after a drunken revelry when you realize you don’t really know all those strangers the way you thought you did at 3am. But right now, arms wrapped around Fritz, he was exactly the person I’d longed to share my experience with.